Waiting on God

Being patient and waiting on God is one of the hardest things ever. Especially when you get that overwhelming feeling that you can make it work and don't really need His help. I've had that feeling a lot lately followed by a feeling of great dispair. In the end I know that there is nothing that I can do or make happen that will be even half as good as what He can do.

We are so blessed to have everything we do in our lives, and we are making a sacrifice so that I can stay home and raise Jackson for a few years. With me being able to finish up my Masters Degree this May, it has realy got my mind thinking about how much more money we could be making if I just had a full time job. Right now I work part time at a clinic in town and I keep a friend's little boy four days a week. But that is nothing compared to what I could be making at a full time job that actually uses my degree. Everytime I start thinking about that, I can't bare the thought of my little boy in daycare. Now I'm not saying there is anything wrong with that, and there are plenty of parents who don't have that choice, but I just don't feel like it is the right one for us.

We also just found out that we are going to be losing some of our income this next semester, and I am going to be driving to Conway for a class and to help teach a class. It seems like this will put a big strain on our finances, but I am trusting in God to come through. I heard something on AFR the other day that said worry is like a temporary form of atheism. WOW! I never really thought about it like that, but basically you have a disbelief that God will do what He promised.

So I have made up my mind to stop trying to make things happen, and I am just going to wait. I'll wait and wait and wait if I have to, but I know it will all work out. I get daily devotional emails from In Touch Ministries by Dr. Charles Stanley. If you have never heard him speak, you definitaly should. He has several dvds and books and he also has a taped church service that airs on Sunday mornings. Believe it or not, today's devotional was about waiting on God. (Now don't tell me God doesn't speak)!

When I started reading I was amazed at how appropriate it was and how much weight was lifted off my shoulders. One of the things he said was that God may not be giving us something right now because he is working out all the other stuff in other people's lives to make that happen.

Anyway, thats a little of what I'm learning right now.

Have a great day!